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Monday, April 21, 2008

its 1am. i'm damn sian now. dont feel like sleeping yet, even though i still have yet to do my maths assignment. but anyway, do you know i tend to get heavy eyebags when i sleep early? and they disappear the later i sleep? its proven with me! really, its true! though thats not why i'm still awake. it is a good excuse though HAHA.

anyway.. i've been damn angry with myself the past few days. so here's 'myself''.


ISTJ
the duty fulfillers
As an ISTJ, your primary mode of living is focused internally, where you take things in via your five senses in a literal, concrete fashion. Your secondary mode is external, where you deal with things rationally and logically.

ISTJs are quiet and reserved individuals who are interested in security and peaceful living. They have a strongly-felt internal sense of duty, which lends them a serious air and the motivation to follow through on tasks. Organized and methodical in their approach, they can generally succeed at any task which they undertake.

ISTJs are very loyal, faithful, and dependable. They place great importance on honesty and integrity. They are "good citizens" who can be depended on to do the right thing for their families and communities. (they mean guai-kia LOL. that's why i'm almost never caught during spot checks haha.) While they generally take things very seriously, they also usually have an offbeat sense of humor and can be a lot of fun - especially at family or work-related gatherings. (hahaha see, i'm funny ok.)

ISTJs tend to believe in laws and traditions, and expect the same from others. They're not comfortable with breaking laws or going against the rules. (HAHAHA i'm the ultimate guai kia!!) If they are able to see a good reason for stepping outside of the established mode of doing things, the ISTJ will support that effort.

However, ISTJs more often tend to believe that things should be done according to procedures and plans. If an ISTJ has not developed their Intuitive side sufficiently, they may become overly obsessed with structure, and insist on doing everything "by the book".

The ISTJ is extremely dependable on following through with things which he or she has promised. For this reason, they sometimes get more and more work piled on them. Because the ISTJ has such a strong sense of duty, they may have a difficult time saying "no" when they are given more work than they can reasonably handle. For this reason, the ISTJ often works long hours, and may be unwittingly taken advantage of.

The ISTJ will work for long periods of time and put tremendous amounts of energy into doing any task which they see as important to fulfilling a goal. However, they will resist putting energy into things which don't make sense to them, or for which they can't see a practical application. (like MATHS! who uses quadratic or trigo in normal daily life?) They prefer to work alone, but work well in teams when the situation demands it. They like to be accountable for their actions, and enjoy being in positions of authority. The ISTJ has little use for theory or abstract thinking, unless the practical application is clear.

ISTJs have tremendous respect for facts. They hold a tremendous store of facts within themselves, which they have gathered through their Sensing preference. They may have difficulty understanding a theory or idea which is different from their own perspective. However, if they are shown the importance or relevance of the idea to someone who they respect or care about, the idea becomes a fact, which the ISTJ will internalize and support. Once the ISTJ supports a cause or idea, he or she will stop at no lengths to ensure that they are doing their duty of giving support where support is needed.

The ISTJ is not naturally in tune with their own feelings and the feelings of others. They may have difficulty picking up on emotional needs immediately, as they are presented. Being perfectionists themselves, they have a tendency to take other people's efforts for granted, like they take their own efforts for granted. They need to remember to pat people on the back once in a while. (hehe.)

ISTJs are likely to be uncomfortable expressing affection and emotion to others.(i'm so sorry kiayi i dont respond to your i love yous haha.) However, their strong sense of duty and the ability to see what needs to be done in any situation usually allows them to overcome their natural reservations, and they are usually quite supporting and caring individuals with the people that they love. Once the ISTJ realizes the emotional needs of those who are close to them, they put forth effort to meet those needs.

The ISTJ is extremely faithful and loyal. Traditional and family-minded, they will put forth great amounts of effort at making their homes and families running smoothly. They are responsible parents, taking their parenting roles seriously. They are usually good and generous providers to their families. They care deeply about those close to them, although they usually are not comfortable with expressing their love. (do you gettit.) The ISTJ is likely to express their affection through actions, rather than through words.

ISTJs have an excellent ability to take any task and define it, organize it, plan it, and implement it through to completion. (wah stupid geog performance task.) They are very hard workers, who do not allow obstacles to get in the way of performing their duties. They do not usually give themselves enough credit for their achievements, seeing their accomplishments simply as the natural fulfillment of their obligations.

ISTJs usually have a great sense of space and function, and artistic appreciation. Their homes are likely to be tastefully furnished and immaculately maintained. They are acutely aware of their senses, and want to be in surroundings which fit their need for structure, order, and beauty.

Under stress, ISTJs may fall into "catastrophe mode", where they see nothing but all of the possibilities of what could go wrong. (my pessimistic side.) They will berate themselves for things which they should have done differently, or duties which they failed to perform. They will lose their ability to see things calmly and reasonably, and will depress themselves with their visions of doom.

In general, the ISTJ has a tremendous amount of potential. Capable, logical, reasonable, and effective individuals with a deeply driven desire to promote security and peaceful living, the ISTJ has what it takes to be highly effective at achieving their chosen goals - whatever they may be.


wl i sound damn boring. hahaha. some guaikia who follows rules and works all the time -.-

i'm some nerd. LOL.


Sunday, April 20, 2008

there are many things i wanna do right now:

- garner all the patience in the world and teach my brothers to play the violin properly cos the screeching is getting on my nerves.
- step down.
- smash my phone.
- play some music, cello or piano.
- kill myself.



"The only thing we know about the future is that it will be different."
- Peter Drucker


Tuesday, April 15, 2008

hello.

sian. i'm sitting right in front of the room in front of cweiqiang in the comp lab now LOL. damn retarded. my stupid computer the java not working, cant do anything. rarr.

learning differentiation.

cweiqiang: "ok, sweet!"
me: -.-
cweiqiang: *laughing retardedly to himself trying to push the screen up.*
everyone: hahaha. -.-

wah damn bored, dont understand anything haha. cweiqiang just laughed to himself again, or rather, the whiteboard -.-

rarr i'm seriously not gonna take maths in senior high man. cant do Ys and Xs, or squares and deltas.

O.O
cweqiang: "WOW my hand feels itchy again!"
cweiqiang: "OK! now, the X^2 killed off each other!"
cweiqiang: "WOW, delta x cancelled off!" :D
everyone: HAHAHHA

*people at the back stand up*
cweiqiang: "haha its like viewing a historic moment, everyone giving standing ovation."

too lame leh. ah anyway shall stop here. its 3.00pm haha. i seriously dont know what he doing already haha.


Wednesday, April 09, 2008

HAHA today during PC period in the hall, i learnt that whatever i said about taking lonely walks and living in the moment, it only applies to introverts and people who senses or are non-intuitive, people like me.


((:


Tuesday, April 08, 2008

since i was already using the comp to do work i thought was due today, which was actually this FRIDAY!, i shall just 顺便 blog haha.

after school today, and after debating non stop about what the chem pract METALLIC element was (which wasnt even required to answer in the first place! -.-), i went to CO room to pract my cello, my standard tuesday routine. but even though i reached at 4 and only had 15mins left to pract, OMG was i sweating like a pig already! ha but anyway its because every single aircon in CO room is spoilt -.-

there are 6.

then went to meet roseline and gang (daniel weijia amanda peirong nicky) in LT2 where i slacked the whole hour away haha.

peirong tried to call rachel tang but apparently some people picked up for her and didnt allow her to come to the phone. so...
weijia: use my phone lah, give me her number, i call and say i'm her mother.
weijia: "hello may i speak to rachel please?"
weijia: "i'm her mother."
weijia: "who are you? can i speak to her? i'm her mother"
weijia: *passing the phone back to peirong frantically* "ITS RACHEL!"

LOL damn funny lah!

while still on the same line, rachel passed to the phone to joylynn so peirong can talk to her. after a while,
peirong: "eh stupid joylynn you better blah blah blah!!!"
peirong: "hello are you joylynn??"

hahaha!

wah, love and miss those times where i can just sit somewhere with friends and laugh about retarded stuff.

then we stayed there until i was running late for shanyin! cos they havent finish their homework -.- in the end they all decided to pass them up the next day. rarr. nevermind, i'm such a nice friend haha.

after leaving the lt, we realised it was raining cats and dogs. ok, they realised, i knew it since i left the co room lol. so, with only 2 or 3 umbrellas and 7 people, i walked in the rain with my pe shirt layed over my file for pu, and used it to cover my head. LOL damn fun! though not as fun as the time me and jiaqian zipped open prida's empty qin tao and stuck our heads in and ran in the rain, laughing until i almost peed on the carpark LOL, until i gave up halfway through the carpark and decided to walk in the rain while laugh until my sides split hahaha.

RARR. was late for shangyin but TL was in a good mood after complaining to guan ls about scolding samuel. AHEM amanda HAHA.

.
.
.
.
.

BIBABOOM! WHEEE!!

-.- haha.
feeling retarded.


my blog's quote of the day:
Love and work are the cornerstones of our humanness.
-Sigmund Freud

rarr, then sometimes i feel like being non human then. must we really have work in our lives?


Saturday, April 05, 2008

Bahh reached home at 11pm today after school haha. can you believe it. anyway, after all the hectic schedules of co, lots of school work and tests, minor level stuff, and others, i felt a little emo again so i looked through my files again.

after looking through all my photos, man how i miss those fun times i had. when i could just leave all the work, deadlines and expectations behind for that few days or even just a mere short period of time, to enjoy and live in the moment, be it camwhoring and slacking around in the parade square, celebrating christmas at a restaurant with my family belting Feliz Navidad, or just swinging on a hammock relaxing at the beach.

those times where we worried about nothing and just had fun, strolling home and going high by the train track, dancing to the live music in the middle of the cruise mall, exploring the ship just the 3 of us at 2am, standing in the middle of the sea letting the waves hit us, enjoying the rough outdoors on an ATV.

compare to now, where i sleep average at 2am, and be up by 630 everyday. doing work, studying, skipping meals, sacrificing all my time, effort, and dignity only just to be called “没用”. where's the fun in that.

life should be enjoyed to the fullest, grab any opportunity for fun that comes our way and ultimately, live in the moment. in today's society where everybody's working against time to meet with schedules, expectations, and deadlines, we hardly have time to meet with the most important thing, ourselves. amidst these timebomb events, sometimes we have to take a rest, slow down our pace, look around and appreciate and enjoy the little things around us. take a slow, lonesome walk home or to anywhere, listen to the silence, and embrace the solitude. take a breather once in a while so we dont suffocate, clear your mind and realise the beauty of all other things not work related.

and thats a life lived meaningfully.
a life worth living.


Saturday, April 05, 2008

SIAN. wl i'm just a few hours late and my PHILOSOPHY ELECTIVE IS GONE!!! rarr.. all because of the jiantao that ended at 9pm. and to think that hiphop were still dancing in DND room O.o

rarr i want philosophy! but no more vacancy. youth flying club aviator's programme, 7cm too short. drug design also no more.. can't believe i'm in art of acting. LOL.

shit.




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