I ♥ Music

Thursday, January 12, 2006

today is such a bad day.

FINE.

I'm SHORT!

I'm so short that i hit a guy's shoulder with my umbrella today.
I'm so short that i managed to fake my age to P5.
I'm so short that my mom's friend thought that i was P5.
I'm so short that my cousins who's a year younger than me are all taller than me now.
I'm so short that i cannot reach the VCD player in my house.
I'm so short that Ms Tan could not see me at the back today.
I'm so short that a big plastic bag touches the ground when i hold it.
I'm so short that i'm 2nd shortest in drumming, among a group of 30 people!
I'm so short that i'm not able to see the canteen stalls during recess when there's so many taller people queing up. worst still next year in RJC, where the stalls are so low!

I'm so short that i'll never grow anymore again, and i haven't even reached my target of 160. worst still, i'm not even 155!

I'm short, skinny and small, and i still play the cello. and i look weird when i do, cos i'm small and the cello looks bigger than me!

why can't girls be like guys and continue to grow till we're 18??!!!

stupid.

I STILL CANT BELIEVE 2 YEARS PASSED JUST LIKE THAT!! i remembered that when i was in P6, which 16 days ago was just last year, i was complaining that i was short, but didnt give up hope cos we only stop growing tall by 14. back then, i still had 2 more years, and trust me, at that time, 2 years seemed long. AND NOW!! I'M ALREADY 14!!!! WAH LAO!!! so fast! SHIT MAN. L.S. lah. and i'm not laughing this time. and from P6 till now.. i didnt even grow 5 cm! @#$!%^&*@#!$%^&*@#$!%^&*@#$!%^&*!!!!

sorry, i dont know vulgarities, but i have alot alot of anger inside. AAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

and now, i'm still trying to accept the fact that I'm short, and will be this way the rest of my life. this short. so short. P5 short. wherever i go next time, say, 10 years down the road, i'll still be looking THIS SHORT. and when i walk past a student next time, they'll be taller than me! if i go down the street, kind people will ask me how old i am..

Stranger: hello.. how old are you? P5? P6?
Me: 24??!!

Thats 10 years later lah i say..

Now, i'll just be very busy telling all the people who asks me how old i am my CORRECT age.
Now, i'll just blend in with the sec 1s this year VERY EASILY. they wont even know i'm there.
Now, i'll just have to get used to all the criticism, insults and "comments" from people.
Now, i'll just have to get used to being compared with other people in terms of size.
Now, i'll just have to hold my umbrella higher so it doesnt hit other people and make them wet. Unless they're super tall, then it'll still hit their face. so TOO BAD, thats your punishment for being so tall and selfish to share your height with people who needs it.

FINE.

as long as you dont go too far, or else you watch out! your seriously gonna die i tell you! best is you keep your mouth shut TIGHT. ~~and i'm also talking about a specific someone here, someone who said to me "ni zhen de hen shou leh." you're seriously not much taller anyway.~~

i am so angry now and still very depressed and thus my predicted short temperedness the next few days.

notice that i have not used any "haha"s in this post. i've not done that before. i just realised this now.

My life is done for. i may have been better off if teacher hadn't told us what she told us today, or in fact, what she told every other class she taught. if she hadn't told us, i may not have remembered that i am 14 now and have stopped growing tall. even if i did, i might still give myself 1 more year, hope that i may still grow taller.

GREAT.